#187: A Note to Jane

Dear Jane,

You certainly are cheerful on the subject of aging!  I’m still reading your book, Prime Time, but so far, it would seem that even when things go horribly wrong (a diagnosis of ALS, for example), you are always able to find a bright side.  When everything else is falling apart, intellectual and spiritual growth is a sort of consolation prize for getting older. 

Although all that “positivity” almost makes me gag, I actually agree with much of your advice.  I am counting on my “third act” holding possibilities, too, so we may just be on the same wave length.

Sort of.

 I confess I am bit disappointed in your need to keep up appearances -- it seems to be at odds with your message about aging gracefully .  But if it is hard for the rest of us to let go of youth, it must weigh more heavily on you who have an image to maintain.  So I think I understand your need to have a bit of “work” done even if your explanation is that you want your outward appearance to reflect your inner vitality...or something to that effect.  Just so you know, Jane, my friends and I feel like that too; we are all geriatric girls.

You don’t need my advice, but I should tell you that lacking your resources, the rest of us minimize the disparity between our minds and our mirrors in other ways.  Face lifts? We smile a lot but try not to walk around like a bunch of demented Cheshire cats.  Air brushing?  The dimmer switch has a similar effect.  In a pinch, it helps to hang out with friends who also have deteriorating eyesight--we look good to them and they look good to us.

And then there is “inner beauty” to which we can all aspire.  But you know already that is the real work of the third act.